Kimi to Taiyou ga Shinda Hi
by Ultima-Matrixed
Summary: The rain often brings back flights of good memory. Though it can also bring about nightmares. ShizNat. Rated T. For Mai Universe's Teaparty for MUses.


_A/N: This is a little one shot I made up for Mai Universe's Tea party for MUses. This breaks a nearly two year long moratorium on this pairing. Enjoy. If you are all smart cookies, you can figure out the title and what it represents. :P_

(Fuuka: Much later)

"It was a different time. Such a bother."

A lone figure said as she peered down onto the academy. Everything was undone years before and even though the sheets of rain threatened to wash it away, it still stood. It would always stand. As a reminder to those who had lost everything, those that gained everything back, and yet more to others. But to the woman, it stood as nothing more than a grave site. Though the tribute wasn't what was lost, but the hollowness that she felt within. She ran for years and years, but still it haunted her. She tried to forget it, but it would burn through every wall her consciousness threw up. She became successful and amassed an empire that would last into the coming centuries. But still, she could never get away.

"To think, I would be brought low by this place, _**yet again.**_" The woman said.

She could cry, but there would be no one to hear it. She could scream, but her throat would just burn raw. She could rage, but it would serve no purpose. She leaned into the rain, as if asking it to purify her. But no such miracle came. The rain beat realities' hard pins into her face and shoulders. The black trench coat did what it could to protect the suit beneath, but it had become a useless battle. The heavy suit only served to remind her of her heavy, cursed, disgusting, self-hating escape.

And then it came. She laughed as her tears began to fall once more. As the day came back into her mind, the day she eternally slaughtered her happiness by being so afraid and childish.

_"Natsuki, are you listening?"_

"No, go away."

_"Natsuki, I came all the way here to see you. The least you could do is to be grateful."_

"You are just a memory that drives me insane. Leave me be, don't drag me back there."

_*giggles* "You are so cute. I'm happy I took the first train I could."_

"Please, I don't want to go back! I spend all my time trying to get away! Leave me alone!"

_"Open your mouth, Natsuki. Say "Ahh". Ahhhhh..."_

"PLEASE."

(That time)

Natsuki did as she was told and opened her mouth. She was rather embarrassed about being fed. But there was something else bothering her, something that she had to tell...

"Natsuki, don't look at me like that. Is that any way to treat the woman who feeds you well?"

"Stop being so silly, I have something to tell you." Natsuki said as attention and silence were directed upon her. The slight cocking of her companion's head begged to say 'Okay, what?'

"I got that job. I start in the fall after graduation. Sort of makes me glad that I stayed for my masters. I've already..." Natsuki was cut off as suddenly the wind was knocked out of her and she was on her back. Though it was probably more the fact that she was being kissed. Not that standard 'that's great' kiss but an 'I am so happy I want to make love kiss.' The momentary free fall into the notion of what waited for her willingly and eagerly blinded her from what she needed to say.

"It seems my weekend study sessions were quite the help."

"There was no studying. I recited a fact; you lost an article of clothing. By half way through the study session you were digging your nails into my shoulders and biting a sofa pillow." Natsuki said to receive knock to the head. She figured now was better time than any.

"The job is overseas." Natsuki said as she looked beyond her lover.

"... That's okay. I can put off my doctorate until we get settled in."

"We won't be settling in. The entry level work of a new executive is too demanding for me to keep a girlfriend. Rather than drag you with me and have you be unhappy, I'd rather just end it now." Natsuki said as the soft eyes of betrayal glanced into her own.

"Just end it now? Just what do you mean by that, Natsuki? Now because you have a hot-shot job coming up, you don't need me anymore."

"It's not like I wanted..." Natsuki stopped dead.

The gauntlet had been dropped and the dagger thrown. She had just irrevocably cut her lover down more than any blade and blown a hole in her soul with greater accuracy than any gun. Natsuki felt hands grab onto her face and then turned her gaze into the one thing she did not want to see.

"Wanted **what**? Wanted 'this' right? So how long have you felt this way? **How many times **have you__…__and looked into my eyes as I climaxed thinking that I was nothing more than a toy? Do you even have the balls to_ tell me that_?"

"Everything will change after I get this job. What we had wasn't worthless. But ... I can't give this up." Natsuki said as she seemed to answer the questions presented her satisfactorily. The hands that had once gripped into her face slid down limply.

"Is this what you really want?"

"Yes."

"Then I want to help you. And if I all I can do to help you is leave. Then I will." *smiles*

"Don't leave like this." Natsuki implored as her lover gathered her things and then turned whilst in tears.

"How should I leave? You've told me you don't want me. And the bad thing is, if it was another woman I could compete with her/it. But it's your future and that I _**can't**_ compete with. I hope you can live with your choices. And, I do wish you well in your endeavors. But, I hope you suffer every time you come here. And you will come back; you won't be able to stay away from the sweet pain you have created in this moment. That isn't much of revenge, but I can live with it."

(Present)

"Some future… You were right, you were always right. I didn't listen then because I didn't understand. I _miss_ you..." Natsuki's thoughts began to muddle as her vision began to cloud. The sneeze that followed confirmed the cold that she now had. Natsuki chuckled to herself at the notion that everything 'she' said had been true. Natsuki willed in her mind for forgiveness, but knew she wouldn't receive it.

The visits were becoming more frequent. There was nothing left, she stood at the top of the world and was horribly bitter because of it.

"You want me to say it! Do you want me to say it?" Natsuki's hoarse voice sailed across the hillside to nothing but trees and flowers. The wind blew the rain against Natsuki's face as to dare her.

"_**Do your worst**_! I miss you _Shizuru_! Come back _Shizuru_! I am miserable and alone! I have nothing and _no one_!" Natsuki said into the howling wind and rain. After her declaration everything seemed to die down. Natsuki could feel the strength leaving her as she began to fall forward. As she suddenly stopped falling, she could hear one last thing come across her sense of hearing.

"Ufufu, I wouldn't quite say _'no one'._"


End file.
